The New World!

Agonisingly slow pace, painfully annoying shaky hand-held filmography and 80’s porn style editing ruines the lirycal script and beautifuly composed soundtrack. The New World was nothing but 540mb waste of my monthly bandwidth!

I counted nearly 10 sunset shots. A single glance at the sunset is sad enough for one day. Why would anyone want to see 10 sad sunset shots in 135 minutes? Hand held filmography is fantastic if you are watching the D Day scene in Saving Private Ryan. But when the bloody camera man can’t hold still for a second while filming a quiet and romantic scene in the New World, you begin to wonder whether he is high on LSD or drunk! Or perhaps there is a bee in his pants!!!

I can go on and on explaining what I meant by 80’s porn style editing or asking why the Natives were walking like monkeys! But to be honest, I disliked this film so much that I don’t want to write about it anymore.

Buy its script. It shouldn’t be more than 50 pages but it is seductively beautiful. Buy (I.E. download) its soundtrack. The piano pieces are brilliant. As for the movie itself, don’t even “spend a penny” on it. Don’t waste your time and bandwidth like I did. Let its DVD rot on the shop shelves! If you can’t resist, go and see Pocahontas. At least Disney’s John Smith doesn’t need to be stitched to a cigarette to look less aweful!

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