Sue Me Baby One More Time!

This is my first post in seven days and the most important thing I could come up with is… Wait for it… Waaaiiit for it… It is about Chris Crocker, again!

The Retard (with the capital R) is getting sued for $1m ~~by a bunch of idiots worse than himself~~ by angels sent from above! According to TMZ, the Californian company, Onch Movement Jewelry, is suing Crocker for “fraud and breach of contract.” Apparently, Crocker had a deal to “wear solely Onch Movement Jewelry during the duration of his stay in LA,” “do two days of press,” and “mention that he was flown out by Plaintiff for the press campaign (a shout-out was deemed sufficient by Plaintiff)” (Onch Vs. Crocker; TMZ; 5th of OCT). And now Onch is suing him because their “business reputation in the media has been greatly damaged.”

Repeat after me: Awwwww!

It’s not that I give a $hit, really. Regardless of what Chris had or hadn’t done, Onch’s “business reputation” is now damaged and not even billions of dollars can do any good! But I feel sorry for the poor judge ~~who’s going to have to listen to both sides’ arguments. On one side, there is a sad and annoying attention seeking whore and the other side, a bunch of rogues~~. Just the thought that he’s going to have to listen to Chris’ agonising screams scares the living $hit out of me! Neither I nor anybody who’s not on THIS LIST should be subject to such an inhumane torture. For that alone, everybody in the courtroom should receive $1m. Also, I think it’s best if the state of California provide everyone with high quality industrial ear defenders for health and safety reasons! Or else, insurance companies are going to be so pissed off…